Toronto;
A City Of Chaos
When does it all begin? Is it immediately after an
overtime championship win, or is it on the way to Toronto
the day of? Either way the defending Division 4 Champs
the Detroit Chaos had only one thing on their minds.......DEFENSE???????????
The Chaos arrived in T.O. once again a little sluggish,
welcoming two wet behind the ear rookies to the squad, it
was yet again time to gel. Terry "Where the heck are
my gloves" Fidler and Brad "More Crown Royal
Sir?" Lipski seemed unfazed by joining a team with
such a glorious past. Indeed Fidler had Shaq size shoes
to fill due to the untimely cow tipping accident to
Dwight " Soul Glow" Channer. The Chaos however
came out flying. The line of Fidler, Benninger and Totzke
quickly connected, thus they were dubbed " The
Cousin Connection". Benninger fed a pretty pass to
Fids who gave the goalie a little how’s she goin’
and etched his name on the score sheet. The second line
of Winslow, Krappler and Belding punished the ladies from
Chicago with their aggressive fore checking. By doing so
they created a wealth of opportunities, though goals were
hard to come by. With many trying to find their skating
legs up here in the frozen tundra that is Canada, one
line never broke stride, the "hustle" line.
Todd " Stitches" Kjellenberg, Pete "
HAAAAAAAAAY!!!!" McDonald and Mike " high stick
to the neck" MacAskill showed the other two lines
how to pressure the puck and obtain quality scoring
chances. Defense played well, Joey you’re a god. I’ll
talk about that later.
DETROIT CHAOS 6 CHICAGO DYNAMOS(Deadbeats)
0
Awaking Saturday morning two things were crystal clear,
no one had been to the hospital and todays’ games
were for Detroit bragging rights. Wanting to impress the
scouts from the Bombers it was indeed time to step it up.
With Fidler and Captain Chaos both scoring and assisting
goals against Chicago the night before they looked to get
#2 on track. So in the second period after Benninger and
Winslow each tallied, the sophomore arrived. First he
found a loose puck in front of the net and managed to
sneak it by the keeper 3-0. Moments later Totzke scooped
up the puck in the neutral zone skated down the right
wing and let a laser beam go which handcuffed the goalie
4-0. Then Benninger broke down the defense and had the
goalie at his mercy, one problem the puck sat inches from
the goal line. Totzke making like a kid at Christmas took
the gift and ran 5-0. The scoring would continue and when
Lipski gave Benninger a beautiful tape to tape pass
Captain Chaos walked in all alone and beat the goalie
like a rented mule. The defense once again played
outstanding. Rotating 5 defensemen the Chaos stayed fresh,
thus holding the opposition to weak and almost
embarrassing opportunities. Joey you’re still a god!
DETROIT CHAOS 10 DETROIT PITBULLS(Poodles)0
After a delicous breakfast(thanks Steve) and a quick
massage in robo- chair it was time for the key match-up,
the Bombers. There is a long and heated past with several
players on both teams, emotions were definately running
high in the dressing rooms. The Bombers seemed up for the
challenge ,after all the Chaos hadn’t allowed a goal
yet. Each team had it’s chances, however Joey proved
to be their Federov’s, Felix Potvin. Somebody should’ve
called the cops cause there was some serious larceny goin’
on (with a little help from the iron). When our third
line got us on the board we had some breathing room. It
seemed as if the Bombers were content to take Benninger
out of the play and make others beat them. BAD MOVE!!! In
the second period when #5 the marked man picked up the
puck in the centre ice area and cruised into the Bombers
zone both defencemen quickly moved to him which left
Totzke all by his lonesome. Captian Chaos delivered a
pretty little drop pass which Totzke one-timed to beat
the keeper. That would prove to be more than enough as we
would walk away with a 3-0 win.
DETROIT CHAOS 3 DETROIT BOMBERS(Bummers) 0
Now that our Saturday games were finished there was
only one thing to do!!!! REST. Ya right ! We had just
walked through the round robin, not allowed a goal and
Kappy was hardly in the box. It was time to celebrate.
The party quickly formed in the cheerleaders room(go
figure) and didn’t take long to hit full stride.
With somebody starting a bottle cap in wine contest
things could only get worse. Everyone drank responsibly,
Theresa made sure of that(HEE HEE!!!). So we waited long
into the evening to let loose(5:30pm) when Theresa was in
bed. Andy why were you in bed at 3:00pm? You know you
were just asking for a wake up call.TIME FOR SOME DINNER
"ONSTAR, Can I help you Mr. Lovell?". Off to
Arizona B-Bar& Grill, great dinner(thanks Mike) a
couple of drinks then off to bed, right Andy.
Sunday morning and the Championship game came pretty
doggon early, but everyone answered the bell, wait, wait
no they didn’t, it seemed we were a right winger
short. With McDonald praying to the porcelain gods, it
was Lovells’ big chance to jump on offence and he
didn’t disappoint the audience, working hard along
the boards. Joey who did end up at the right hotel played
phenomenal shutting down the Bombers once again. The game
played out with not as much drama as was expected. The
Bombers were undermaned and basicly couldn’t play at
our level. Though Joey and our defence allowed them to
score twice, it gives our entire team something to shoot
for next year, NO GOALS.
DETROIT CHAOS 6 DETRIOT BOMBERS(Bummers) 2
Now that another great tournament is behind us, let me
leave you with a couple of pieces of advice......Goldschlager
is no longer welcome(although it is better than shots of
rye), styrofoam coolers are banned from the premesis,
never eat chips in bed, always double check your hockey
bag as to not forget anything ie. gloves, robo-chair isn’t
all it’s cracked up to be, we do have the best fans/cheerleaders
on the face of the planet, no naps in the afternoon(unless
you deadbolt your door), drinking wine is fine, sleeping
at 5:30pm not so fine, it wasn’t a skunk it was you
Fids, climbing through 2nd floor hotel windows
is not the best idea unless Kappy is helping you up,
"this is a hotel not a prison", next year we’ll
be fighting for jobs as two important keys will hopefully
be returning Channer and White, and always remember
hockey is a game of win and lose, or in our case just win.
Recap by Jay.
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