|
Name |
# |
Position |
Don
Cherry's Chaos Preview
 |
|
Belding, Preston |
|
Wimpout |
After a dismal year in 2008, the big Forward
has decided to stay in Columbus where he will have a legitimate excuse for
yet another zero goal performance. Like the Blue Jackets in the
Playoffs, Belding is a big zero this year. |
|
Benninger, Steve |
5 |
C |
The Captain did everything possible to have a
big year in 2008 by surrounding himself with the two McDonalds.
Unfortunately, it was not enough. It is doubtful he will do much
better this year since he has moved the elder McDonald to Center on the
third line. |
|
Channer, Dwight |
42 |
F |
Dwight did not have to carry Captain
Benninger last year and his game blossomed. A seasoned hockey observer
like me knows how hard he worked despite the lack of real statistics. |
|
Fidler, Terry |
|
wimpout |
Like Belding, Terry's game slipped badly last
year and he has decided to hang up his skates for a year hoping that a long
rest will make the fans forget his pathetic 2008 performance. |
|
Hill, Jason |
11 |
D |
A surprise addition on D after The Enforcer
joined the ranks of the wimpouts, Hill is a major reason the Chaos have been
moved down to the Rec division. Although he has worked hard on
his game the last few years, I have to wonder what Captain Chaos must have
been thinking when he offered Hill a contract. |
|
Kappler, Brian |
7 |
F |
Like clockwork, Kappler continues to perform
the same year after year. One has to wonder why Captain Chaos
continues to accept near complete mediocrity. |
|
Kinlin, Peter |
6 |
D |
Although he is normally a strong performer on
D, he is well known for making a critical blunder that costs the team a
goal. Without the reliable JOEY in net to bail him out, Kinlin will
have to step his play up in a big way for the Chaos to have a prayer of
playing a game on Sunday. |
|
Krizek, Joey |
|
|
What? No JOEY? What will become
of the Chaos? It is doubtful they will find anyone who can fill his
skates, let alone consume his beer. |
|
Lipskie, Brad |
|
Wimpout |
In a surprise, last minute decision, The once
mighty Enforcer declined the coveted invitation to play for the Chaos this
year. The rumor is that his lame excuse that he has to work is a
complete smokescreen. Since when does anyone tell The Enforcer
what to do? The truth is that his game slipped badly this year
after he put on more than a few pounds lounging around the house, eating
Alberta beef and watching his wife take of the new baby while on his
maternity leave. |
|
Lovell, Andy |
13 |
D |
Mr. Lovell skates every year and every year
he wonders where the Captain is going to put him. Hopefully for Andy,
it will not be on the bench. Andy is my pick for the surprise player
of the tournament. I will be surprised if he tallies a point. |
|
Macaskill, Mike |
3 |
C |
Mike has maintained a solid level of play the
last few years, but apparently Captain Chaos has seen something he doesn't
like. Mike has been demoted to left wing on Pete's line. Will he step it
up, or will he whine about it? I think we all know the answer. |
|
Marchesi, Marty |
80 |
G |
The world famous Roller Goalie has been hand
picked to take over the duties of the famous JOEY. These are big
skates to fill but Roller Goalie is one big man. Despite being thrown
out of a game for over size pads in a D- league, he backstopped the Sunday
Sharks to the Championship less than a month ago. Can he continue his
performance? We will see. He is more than a bit overweight by Chaos
standards and the fast play in Niagara. He has been challenged by the
Captain to report in at 232. If he makes it, there will be an
incredible amount of pizza and wings consumed in Niagara. If
not, who will be in Net? |
|
McDonald, Pete |
4 |
F |
After turning 50 less than a month ago, he
has stepped his game up big time. The 2nd leading scorer on the D-
Shark team has earned a trial at the Center position after impressing the Captain with
his improving skills. I look for a big weekend for him and nobody
should be surprised if wins more than one Player of the Game awards. |
|
McDonald, Paul |
91 |
F |
Paul stepped onto the Captain's right wing
last year with big expectations based on his Dad's incredible past performances.
He did not disappoint tallying 2 goals in the first game, dominating play
and winning the player of the game award. Unfortunately, he could not
keep it up and virtually disappeared the next 2 games. The Captain is
hoping Paul has worked on his conditioning so he can impact all 4 games. |
|
Owen, Will |
66 |
D |
Will tagged along last year to make sure
Sandstrom and Paul stayed out of trouble. He failed miserably and most
observers thought it would be the one and only time he saw Niagara with the
Chaos. But fortune has smiled on the young lad and with all the
wimpouts the Captain moved the Chaos to a low enough division where
Will is eligible to play his unique brand of pathetic defense.
Look for Will to be the only player on the team to make fewer passes than
Captain Chaos himself. |
|
Sandstrom, Eric |
15 |
D |
What can we say about da Butcha? We can
say that he has not played much this year and nobody knows if he will be
worth the roster spot. He will certainly be consuming his share of
beer, but will the new goalie appreciate him? Last year's
erratic performance had many wondering if the Chinese yeast infection on his
head had penetrated his brain, Let's just say he is a bigger
question mark than ever this year. |
|
Totzke, Jay |
2 |
F |
Jay played a solid tournament last year but
could not step up when it counted. Most would say that he is really
starting to show his age. I am not so sure. Without Terry to
drag him down this year, I look for him to rebound to his old form and have
a halfway decent performance. |
|
Wagy, Rich |
|
wimpout |
Another Chaos regular has wimped out.
Is anyone worried? Not in the least. The Captain has replaced
him with a young, hungry Will Owen. Only the Niagara bars are upset
about this move. |
|
White, Dave |
|
wimpout |
Dave was supposed to be the reporter last
year and he did a great job - until Saturday morning. We all saw him
taking notes during the Saturday games, but a later investigation found his
notebook and revealed that he had done nothing more than write "I wish Steve
would let me play" 1,000 times. Where will he be this year? I
don't know. |
|
Winchester, Chris |
TBD |
F |
A very late addition to the team, not much is
known about him other than the fact that he usually does not show up even
after making solemn promises. A little detective work has
revealed that that at one time he had decent speed and moves but not have
much of a shot. Worse yet for a team with the Roller
Goalie was a report that he was not a 2-way player, rarely bothering
to skate inside his own blue line. |
