MADRAS, India — C. Manoharan Snake Manu practices with a garden snake by running it through his nose and out his mouth in an attempt to create a Guinness Record. Manu plans to set the record by using a live cobra.

Seeing this picture is so funny, because it totally reminds me of when me and my friends get together!

We’re always makin’ sass and joshing each other. It’s not that we don’t like one another, it’s just that it’s sometimes more fun to poke fun and giggle than be serious. We’re like a barrel of apes on laughing gas, my friends and I.

Of course, when we aren’t making funny, we mostly spend our time pulling cobras through our sinuses.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve taken a poisonous, deadly cobra, inserted it into my nostril, and forcibly manipulated it until I was able to pull it out through my mouth. For me, it’s about the same thing as eating pizza. Now it looks like ol’ C. Manoharan Snake Manu from India has also found out about this trick. He’s stealing our thunder, and crying with joy about doing so, by the looks of it. That snake-snorting bastard. I oughta punch him in his genitals until he pukes cobra venom.

I suppose this just means it’s time for my buddies and I to come up with a new pastime to whittle away the hours when we aren’t out pullin’ some hilarious mischief. Maybe we could lop the tail off a rhino and try to run it through our nose while managing to elude the furious beast hell-bent on impaling us. Maybe we could try squatting naked into a vat of lime green jell-o. Maybe we could crush our thumbs in a vise. Hell, I don’t know. Whatever we do, it sure ain’t gonna be nearly as cool as cobra snorting.

Oh well. Times change. Hopefully C. Manoharan Snake Manu’s girlfriend won’t be horribly killed by a deadly cobra bite like mine was.