Detroit Chaos
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Detroit Chaos- 2004 Results Results
The results were once again disappointing for the Detroit Chaos.  Below are links for official statistical results:

Final Standings  , Official Team Statistics , Individual Statistics

Here is the Hockey North America summary of the tourney.  It includes some comments about the Cheating Mother-Frickers from Dayton and their forfeit strategy.  What a bunch of Ohio sissies (we are competing for the website award this year, so we can't call them Ohio Pu-----.

Game 1 - Friday Night - The tourney started out on a very low note for the Chaos.  We had to play a team from the level above us.  They were from Dayton, Ohio.  We all know it is a disgrace to lose to any team from Ohio.  They stomped us 7 - 1.  Even the great JOEY was no match.  Thanks a lot Captain for setting this up.

Game 2 - Saturday Morning - This game will be forever remembered as the slush bowl.   The ice sucked.  We played the Mother-Frickers - another team from Dayton.   This is the team that cheated to get in the final, then cheated again in the final by bringing in their good players from the upper division.  Anyway, they had a couple of players dressed up like idiots with helmets that light up.  There is a picture of one of the idiots right here - make sure you click this link because I was able to track down where he lives and works after the tourney..  We know we were better than they were, but being from Ohio, they were probably used to lousy ice.  They had a couple of breaks and squeaked by us 3-2.

Game 3 - Saturday Afternoon - We were very fortunate to win this game.   The team was from Buffalo and they were called the Sharks.  They had beaten the Mother-Frickers on Friday night.  We jumped out to an early lead because about 1/2 of their team was not even dressed.  There was a big fight going on between them and the organizers of the tourney thanks to the cheatin' Mother Frickers who elected to forfeit (chickened out) of their game against the Division 1 team.  The Sharks could have just skipped their game with us and been in the finals against the Mother-Frickers, but since they were from a real hocky state and they were men, they decided to play us.  They were far better than the Mother-Frickers but we were fired up and held onto our early lead and won the game.  They certainly deserved to be in the finals against us, but the organizers lacked guts to do the proper thing which was to send the Mother-Frickers back to Ohio with their stupid light up  helmets on, so we had to play the Mother-Frickers on Sunday.

Saturday Night - Since we had barely lost to the Mother-Frickers on Saturday AM, we were feeling pretty confident about the Championship.  We figured with good ice, our superior talent, and the hockey Gods on our side, we would surely win.  We stayed at the hotel like good boys and had a few sodas up in the courtesy room that the Captain had lined up.  Unfortunately, there were people in the nearby rooms with very sensitive hearing.  They called and complained a couple of times and despite Pete's best efforts to calm down the foreigner at the front desk, we had to disband the party around 1:00am. 

Game 4 - Sunday Morning - Played some of the Mother-Frickers and lots of their buddies form the Division 1 Dayton Team.  This was a completely different bunch of Frickers than who we played in the slush bowl.  The game was marred by lots of rough play and penalties.  At the end of the game there was a bench clearing brawl.  We went down fighting 3-2. This was, by far, the most bitter defeat in Detroit Chaos history.  Next year, we will be on a mission from God. 

Click here to see the pictures from the party.